Famine: The Quiet Apocalypse Page 12

  “Sam! There’s windows!” The light clicked off. “I saw a closet.” This time I pulled, and let him toward the far wall where I’d seen the opening. The three of us piled into the tiny room and Sam locked the door behind us, plunging us into utter blackness.

  He turned the flashlight back on and illuminated our panting, breathless bodies.

  I took one look at the blood covering my arms and Honey Badger’s head, and sank to the floor as I burst into tears.

  15: Hide and Seek

  “Hey, hey. Come here. It’s okay.”

  “It’s not!” I wailed, trying frantically to scrub the drying blood from my arms. “We killed them, Sam...we ran them down and killed them!”

  Sam unzipped his backpack and pulled out a water bottle and washcloth. “Okay, okay. Hey. Deidre, stop hitting me, I’m not going to hurt you. Honey, calm down. You’ve got to be quiet. Deidre. Deidre!” He dropped the water bottle and grabbed me in a hug, pulling me to his chest. I buried my head in his coat and sobbed. I felt like I was drowning. The guilt and the adrenaline washed over me in waves until I felt like a wrung-out sponge.

  “Hey.” Sam pushed me back just far enough that he could pick up the water and dampen the washcloth. Except for the sound of my hiccuping sobs and Honey Badger’s panting, we were surrounded by silence. “Let’s get you cleaned up.” He gently wiped the blood from my arms as Honey Badger “helped” by licking my face. “Quit, dog.” He moved her face aside and poured water on a clean corner of the little towel. Honey Badger grumbled and curled up against my back. “Deidre, you’re okay. Breathe, honey.”

  As he moved the cloth across my face, I lifted blurred eyes to meet his. “What have we done, Sam? What have we done?”

  The gentleness in his hands was in contrast to the determination in his eyes as he dabbed away the drying blood. “We did what we had to do.”

  “We killed them. We killed people, Sam. we’re murderers.”

  “No.” He stopped, and grasped my chin with one hand, his blue eyes fixed on mine. “You are not a murderer, Deidre. If anyone’s a murderer, I am. They would have killed us. It had to be done.”

  I groaned and closed my eyes as he resumed cleaning. “Why?”

  “Because some people are evil, just like some are good. You want to see the good in everyone, but sometimes it doesn’t exist.” His hands paused, and Honey Badger growled. “Shh. I hear them. They’re looking for us.” The angry sound of yelling men and pounding feet reached me through the residual ringing in my ears and the walls and doors between us.

  I had the presence of mind to clamp my hand over Honey Badger’s snout. She huffed, but quieted. Sam turned the flashlight off and held my hand as we sat in darkness so deep I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face.

  My chest tightened as the door to the other room rattled. A muffled voice reached us. “It’s locked.”

  “See if you can break it down. The rest of you keep going.”

  Sam hugged me tight, and I kept my grip on the dog’s head as something heavy thudded against the door.

  Thud. Honey Badger whined, and I clamped my hands even tighter over her muzzle.

  Thud. The walls around us shuddered, and bits of plaster fell from the ceiling.

  Thud. I whimpered as I nearly lost my hold on the dog and she scratched my arm.

  Thud. Sam’s hand went over my mouth to keep me quiet.

  Thud. I held my breath as the sound of metal creaking reached us. But as I held it ten, twenty, thirty seconds, until spots swam in front of my eyes, the sound didn’t come again. All was quiet except for the murmur of distant, angry voices. Then, just as I was about to pass out, the multitudinous pounding of boots on the ground moved away from us down the hall.

  It was long after the sounds of boots and voices faded that I let Honey Badger go and dared to breathe. “Do you think they’re really gone, or are they just waiting for us?”

  “There’s no way to know. We should just spend the night here.”

  I was far too exhausted to argue, even if I’d wished to. I had no desire to leave the tiny closet if it meant risking the kind of death we faced at the hands of those who sought us. So Sam set his flashlight on a shelf and we unrolled our sleeping bags there on the floor of that little supply closet. Surrounded by reams of paper and bottles of cleaner, I laid on the hard floor and held tight to Sam’s hand as the adrenaline crash claimed me and sent me to sleep.

  ***

  Is it possible to die from pain? I knew I was being dramatic. As I swam toward consciousness, all I could feel was pain. My hips and back hurt from sleeping on the floor, My neck was sore from multiple accidental attempts on my life. My arm ached where the cannibal had grabbed it, and my cheekbone on that side throbbed along with my heartbeat.

  As I sat up, I groaned. Sam must have left the flashlight on all night. The little light was so faint it was almost invisible. Hints of daylight crept in beneath the door.

  Sam was still asleep. Either he was so exhausted he’d managed to avoid a nightmare, or I’d been too deeply asleep to notice. Honey Badger was curled up at the end of our sleeping bags with her tail over her nose. Her chocolate eyes watched me and the end of her tail wiggled in acknowledgement of my gaze on her. In the dim light, the blood caked into her dark fur was barely visible.

  I reached out and touched the top of the dog’s head with gentle fingers. Tears burned behind my eyes as my fingers passed over the blood on her scarred face. “You were scared, but you still fought to save me.” At my whisper, she lifted her head and licked my hand. “You didn’t know what was happening and you barely know me but you fought for me. Maybe you’re the bravest and purest of all of us.”

  The dog whined and jumped up to stand at the door. I pushed myself to my feet, only then realizing I’d left my cane behind. I took a glance at Sam, then at the gun he’d left on the shelf next to the flashlight. After a moment’s hesitation, I decided to let him sleep a little longer. If he and Honey Badger could be so brave, so could I.

  My hand closed around the cold metal and I returned to the door. After a moment listening to make sure nobody was outside, I unlocked the knob and pushed it open.

  Honey Badger pushed past me and we stepped out into what once must have been the warehouse’s breakroom. A couple of soda fridges stood along the opposite wall, alongside a kitchenette with a sink and microwave. The rest of the room was a random collection of metal and folding tables, and faded plastic chairs. Except for the table we’d shoved across the door, the room was untouched.

  Cringing at the noise, I moved the end of the table far enough to let me unlock the door’s top and bottom bolts. I watched the dog sniff at the door, and only opened it once I made sure she didn’t smell anyone beyond. I pulled it open and stuck my head into the hallway to check both directions before I allowed Honey Badger to step through.

  They could still be nearby. My heart was in my throat as I held the gun gingerly in both hands and followed Honey Badger down the wide corridor toward the glass doors at the end. Sunlight spilled through them, blinding white as it reflected off the snow.

  I repeated my checks when we reached the exterior door. It opened onto some sort of three-sided courtyard with a couple of truck bays on one side, and a fence with a wide gate on the other. Honey Badger dashed out into the yard to do her thing. I moved to the side of the doors and leaned back against the sun-warmed brick. For the first time in days, the temperature was above freezing. Water dripped from the roof to pool on the concrete. The snow was still deep in the shade, but was becoming patchy in the light.

  If we can just get the truck back, we might have a chance. It was a big if. We’d killed at least four of their comrades. It was hard to believe they’d just abandon all hope of finding us so soon. They didn’t seem like the smartest or most organized people, but it didn’t take much intelligence to know we’d likely come back for our vehicle. If we don’t get it, we’re screwed. We can’t walk 600 miles of wasteland in this kind of weather. We’d
be dead within the first hundred. I grimaced as I watched Honey Badger systematically sniff her way around the courtyard. Well, I would be anyway. Sam would probably find a way to make it, and the dog was probably able to sleep snuggled into a snowdrift or something. I was the one dragging everybody down.

  A chilling thought hit me. If we can’t get the truck, maybe I should send Sam on without me. I knew what that meant. I’d stay here, alone, trying to dodge a group of vicious men who wanted to murder and rape me...and for my own sake, I’d have to hope it was in that order. I’d be lucky if I lived long enough to die of starvation.

  The door opened and I nearly jumped out of my skin. It was only Sam, who stood blinking bleary eyes in the morning sunlight. When he saw me, he strode over and enveloped me in strong arms without a word. I hugged him back, not caring how he smelled of unwashed clothing with the faintest undercurrent of blood.

  When he finally released me and held me at arms’ length, his eyes searched mine. “Are you okay?”

  I wasn’t ready to unpack all the layers of consciousness necessary to answer that question, so I just nodded. “Better than last night, at least.”

  He straightened. “I’m so sorry you had to see that.”

  “What’s done is done.” I didn’t mean it in a dismissive way. We’d have time to explore our various traumas when the apocalypse was over. It was just a fact. “We can’t change the past. All we can do is keep moving forward.”

  Sam nodded. “Yeah, about that...the Cannibals aren’t very likely to just let us walk up and have our truck back.”

  I returned to my stance leaning against the wall. “I figured.” When I saw his eyes touch upon the gun in my hand, I offered it to him. “We have to try. Staying here isn’t an option.”

  “Nope.” He tucked the gun into the back of his waistband.

  Honey Badger’s head popped up, and I tensed as the faint sound of an engine reached my ears.

  “Let’s get inside.” Sam opened the door for me, then whistled for the dog. She came barrelling across the courtyard and through the doorway so fast she almost knocked me down. Sam locked the door behind us, then we all hurried back to the closet.

  Once we were safely barricaded back in the small space, Sam pulled the gun out of his belt and set it back on the shelf. We’d blocked the door into the break room, but left the closet door open a crack to let light in. It could be closed quickly if needed.

  I pulled the little bag of dog food out of my backpack and poured a pile of it on the floor for Honey Badger. The dog went to town on the kibble, the end of her tail wagging as she scarfed it down.

  Even though we were safe for now, my stomach was still too tight from stress for me to be hungry. I watched Sam eat his way through an MRE as I sipped one of our dwindling number of water bottles.

  “We need a plan.”

  Sam glanced up at me, his plastic fork halfway between brown meal package and his mouth. With a rueful look at the food, he stuck the utensil back into the bag. The smell vaguely resembled meatloaf.

  In moments like this, I fiercely missed my relaxing mornings with my hot cups of honeyed tea and my fuzzy blankets as I sat in front of my computer and scrolled through miles of posts about moderately happy people doing inconsequential things.

  “On that front, I have some ideas.”

  I focused on him again when I realized he was speaking. “That’s good, because I don’t.”

  Sam’s smile was gentle as he reached out and took my hand. “It’s okay not to be good at everything, Deidre. I was trained for these situations. You weren’t. Thankfully, these men seem to be more cruel than they are intelligent. I think if I can distract them, you can retake the truck and we can meet back up somewhere away from the warehouse.”

  “And if they’ve taken all our stuff? We won’t make it to Minot with the fuel left in the truck.”

  “It may. The tank is nearly full, and pickups have a much larger range than little cars. But one problem at a time. At the very least, it’ll shave miles off the trip. Every mile we can drive is one we don’t have to walk.”

  I allowed him to convince me, at least in that moment. Maybe a pleasant lie was better than the harsh truth, and my brain couldn’t handle that truth. Maybe he really was right. Either way, there was nothing we could do about it now.

  16: The Best Laid Plans of Mice And Men

  It took two days to put our plan into action. First we waited until Sam was sure most of the snow was gone. The clearer the roads, the harder we’d be to track. The food supplies in our backpacks were running low, but it couldn’t be helped. We just had to hope there’d be abandoned places to raid along the way.

  By the time Honey Badger and I had taken our place hidden near the warehouse exit, I was going stir-crazy from being cooped up in the closet so long. We hadn’t heard anything from the Cannibals except for the occasional sound of an engine in the distance, but we had to assume they were watching the truck. Even in their insanity, they were smart enough to know we’d try to come back for it.

  The sun was out. The sky was clear, with no threat of snow.

  “It’s a good day to outsmart a cannibal.” Sam grinned at me as he kissed me goodbye. I struggled against the sick feeling in my stomach. I was terrified every time he left my sight--frightened I’d never see him again. This time was the worst of all, as he was heading outside into Cannibal-watched territory. He wouldn’t tell me exactly what he was doing. All he’d say was I’d know when it was time to run for the truck.

  “Give it a count of twenty after my signal before you head out.”

  “But what is the signal?” I was whining, but he didn’t acknowledge it.

  “You’ll know. Just keep the dog quiet, and be ready to run.”

  Resigning myself to the fact he wouldn’t tell, I nodded. I fought back the tears which threatened to fall. “Be careful.”

  “Always.” He took off across the warehouse’s main space, his backpack thumping on his back, looking every bit the soldier. I watched until he disappeared between pallets, then I slumped back against the wall and hugged a squirmy Honey Badger to my chest.

  “I know, honey. I know.” She whined, straining to follow Sam. But she couldn’t. She might give him away, or get frightened and run off at a critical moment. “You’re stuck with me, sweetheart. It’ll be okay. Sam’s smart. Sam’s strong. He’ll make it.” I wasn’t sure whether I was trying to reassure her or myself.

  Time dragged on until I was sure I was going to crawl out of my skin. Honey Badger whined and squirmed against my grip until I let her go to avoid getting scratched. I sat on the concrete until the cold seeped deep into my body, relentless despite the fact I was wearing thermal underwear under jeans under sweatpants and even more layers on my upper half. Nothing in my Southern life had prepared me for this kind of cold. At least the closet had been a bit warmer with the three of us in such a small space.

  Just when the cold and quiet had begun to lull me into a sort of dozing stupor, the ground beneath me shuddered. I jumped up, as did Honey Badger. Another explosion soon followed the first.

  You’ll know, he’d said. When you hear the signal, count to twenty. Drive to the spot on the map. I’ll meet you there. If I don’t make it within ten minutes, go on without me. Taking a deep breath, I began my count. I waited a beat before each number, wanting to make sure the Cannibals had plenty of time to abandon whatever hiding spots they used to keep an eye on our truck.

  Boom. A third explosion rumbled through the walls.

  Ten. Eleven. Twelve. My limbs ached with the need to move as I forced myself to stillness. Finish the count first. Fifteen. Sixteen. Seventeen.

  “Go!” I shouted at the dog as I followed my own advice. I ran for the doorway, ignoring the pain in my ankle that threatened to take me down with each step.

  Just feet from the door, my leg gave out and I fell to my hands and knees on the freezing concrete. Pain shot up through all four limbs, and a confused Honey Badger skidded to a stop
and ran back to me.

  Groaning, I staggered to my feet, and limped forward. Just a few more feet, Deidre. Just a few more.

  I stepped from darkness into blinding light, and quickened my pace in the direction of the truck. As soon as my eyes adjusted, I changed my course just slightly. Everything was silent, except for my own steps and Honey Badger’s claws on asphalt.

  As soon as Honey Badger leapt into the cab, I climbed into the seat and slammed the door shut, locking it. I fumbled the keys into the ignition and turned them. The truck rumbled to life, and I shoved the gear stick into drive.

  Something in the rearview mirror caught my eye. Billows of black smoke issued from a building at the end of the street. Men ran down the street toward it, even more frightening in the daylight now that I could see the nature of some of the skins they wore. Not one seemed to have heard the truck, they were all focused on the explosions. You did it, Sam. Now come back to me.